Friday, February 18, 2011

Cloak, You Imbecile.

So. I have been wearing a cloak to school lately, and no one knows what it is. It is infuriating.

"Hey, cool cape!"
"Rot in a sack."

"Why are you wearing that cape?"
"I hate you with a passion."

"What's with the blanket?"
"Die in a hole."

"What are you wearing?"
"No, I mean the cape thingy."

"How does it feel wearing a blanket-thingy all day?"
"I want to kill you all for saying it's a blanket thingy."

And I spilled my juice at lunch.

And you know what caused all this?? I said, "Today shall be a good day."

NEVER say that. Ever.

Monday, February 7, 2011


No, it's not a spelling bee. I got my braces today. As is custom, whenever devil spawn works in my mouth, I communicate with sign language with my mom. What I don't want her to know, but really want to 'say', I type on an invisible keyboard. Some of the things I said, and why I said them:

On the invisible keyboard:
"And so she spent all of second period with some stupid newbie sunburning her freaking mouth." The nurse in training was drying my teeth with the UV thingy.
"Twerp-wad!!!!!!!!" The orthodontist was poking me a lot, and it was annoying.

With sign language:
"Owowowowow" The etching stuff got on my tongue and it burned.
"Sunburn" The UV thingy again.
"Evil" Poking and other nuisances in my mouth.
"Pain" Etching stuff.
"Nasty" Etching stuff.
"Farkle" Pushing on my teeth to get the bands in.
"Cuss! Cuss!" Pushing way too hard on my tooth to get the band in. So hard I cried.